4:30 p.m. - 2003-08-26
Rantings of a (crazy) wife ...
It's 4:30 and it's almost time to go home. I have been upset for the past couple of days and I have a heavy heart as well. I have come to the conclusion that no matter what happens in my husband�s life he will NEVER be happy. He always says that I make him happy but I never see him smile. I am one of those people when something happens if I am not dead by the end of it then it's not fucking worth getting upset over. I would like to think I am a happy go lucky person, and I would like to keep it this way.

My husband is slowly bringing me down, down to where he is. I don't want that, so what on earth do I do? He and I can talk about anything but when he gets in these moods then it's hard to get an answer out of him about anything. He gets cocky and hateful sometimes when we talk about stuff he doesn't want to hear. In the end we work it out and go on to the next life thing. I have been very hopeful for a while but my hope is starting to turn into hopelessness and I am starting to get annoyed with him more and more everyday. Right now he is a miserable fuck and I can't even look at him. Don't get me wrong when things are going good we click, but lately he has been on this porn head thing and he claims that all of his current thoughts are in this general vicinity. I don't mind but we have had sex for 2 of the past 3 days and I was really tired last night, so what does he do? He cops and attitude the entire night. Sorry I was tired. Lately everything has been about him and what he wants.

They are building another building in the front of the complex I am in. It is going to be the new delivery center and my husband�s new building. So of course he has a big head over this and he is the best and so on� Well I wish for once he would leave his work at work and not bring it home with him. I was sick this past week, I had a sinus and 2 ear infections. I was starting to feel better on Friday so I said to him I was up for some sex tonight, not the kinky stuff though but just so good old fashion sex. What does he do? He cops an attitude about it. You think he would be jumping at the chance at any sex but no it�s what he wants. I will stop my whining now.

So I just got off the phone with him and he is acting like nothing has happened in the past 2 days. Oh well I guess I�ll just go with the flow.

Me***

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