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3:36 p.m. - 2003-09-02 Then on Sat. I cleaned and cleaned. I never knew how dirty a house could get with 3 cats and 2 adults. I ask myself all the time why we have such a big house, and the only answer I can come up with is, I am a glutton for punishment. My husband and I have decided not to have any children and for good reason. Reason # 1: Why bring up a child in the world today? To me the world is overpopulated as it is and I don�t want to contribute to that. Plus I don�t want my child to hurt because they saw something terrible on the news or whatever. I know it is bound to happen and that�s life but this is my decision. Some times I talk to people who have children and some really want to have children to love and nurture, but then you get the person who is having a baby because she didn�t use protection with their boyfriend and it�s an oops. Well you should have thought about that before you did the deed. Then in 9 months the child is either sitting in a plastic bag or left out on the street somewhere. That is what upsets me the most because these people don�t think about anything but themselves. Around the area I live there was a newborn found in a garbage can just left to die and the baby did. How sad is that. Because some idiot was too selfish and didn�t think about nothing but herself, that baby will never know if it could have had a chance with another family, to be something. How sad. Then you have the people who have a baby to save your marriage. That�s smart, you would think this would hurt it more because of all the stress you are under taking care of this baby. My ex-husband wanted to have a baby to save our marriage. All I could do is laugh in his face, because at the time he would nit even do the damn dishes. Then you have the people who have children and love them but because they are so caught up with their own life, hardly pay any attention to them and spoil them by buying them stuff rather than sitting them down and talking to them. Reason # 2: I am very selfish with my time. I come home, cook dinner, do the dishes, do a load of laundry take care of my cats and whatever else I can fit in until I am ready for bed. I don�t have time for a baby. I also like my alone time. I thought, as I got older that I would want a child but it never happened. It also has a lot to do with the fact that I brought my brother up when I was 14. I missed out on that summer and half of my freshman year at high school. I wanted to go to school so bad because at 14 you are just not ready for a child and I didn�t mind because he was my half brother (we have the same Mom but different Dad�s) but that�s a lot of responsibility for a 14 year old. My brother is lucky to have his 2 parents together. Mine could not get a long. Read this entry to get an idea. Good god almighty Anyway to all of you who do have children who want children, I have a lot of respect for you and lots of luck as a parent. It takes a lot of patience and love to do it. I have the love I just don�t have any patience. Sorry for my going off. Sunday and Monday was quiet and I just did laundry and little stupid shit that usually adds up. It was quiet. So remember the job I went for Read these entries: Interview ,and No job for you Well I got a call from the office manager and she wanted me to call her this weekend and I just totally forgot. I know she wants me to work there but I am not second place and I won�t get what I am getting paid here. We�ll see what happens. Well I have scribbled a lot about nothing so I am going now. Me**
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